This makes me look forward to retirement - what fun

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by bikebum1975, Jul 7, 2009.

  1. bikebum1975

    bikebum1975 Member

    Yesterday I was at my local Cosco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

    What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, but that I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with IVs in both arms.

    I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with
    my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to play with an Irish Setter and a car hit us both.

    I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

    Cosco won't let me shop there anymore.

    Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

  2. hammer23

    hammer23 New Member

    ha...good one....cept the diet really works....u know ?
  3. Mountainman

    Mountainman Active Member

    you retired at 34 -- that's amazing !!
    my son is 35 and talking about retirement
    don't understand what's going on these days ??

    think that I worked 35 too many years ?? dang - I hate that !!!
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2009
  4. RMWdave

    RMWdave Member

    hahahaha "the car hit us both"
  5. bikebum1975

    bikebum1975 Member

    Ha not quite have to wait for the lottery to come in. LOL
  6. nhfembiker

    nhfembiker New Member

    Thanks, I really needed my laugh for the day :)
  7. fm2200

    fm2200 Member

    I like the the term rideable art, I just wish most people would consider this as a fair weather transportation alternative. What I usually get is gawkers and a few questions occasionally but that's it, no real interest nothing in the way of where can I get one or how much are they. They think there to dangerous to ride in traffic and the lack of real power really makes you vulnerable.
  8. 5-7HEAVEN

    5-7HEAVEN Guest

    I retired from Verizon in 2002 after 32 years' service. I work for the State in a white-collar position as an aide, just to keep busy. Boring at times, so I amuse myself by commuting via motorized bike and pedalling another bike during lunch.

    I get gawkers everywhere, some with questions. It is very exciting to ride with traffic, but it's a helluva lot more vulnerable if you can't keep up with the cars.
  9. robin bird

    robin bird Member

    Wowzer good one !!ill have to use it !!